Wednesday, October 27, 2004

hmmms.. did i mentioned I sent a sms to Yes9.33FM for sms dedication everynite? the messages are all for her.. just her.. messages to express my misses for her.. and that i'll never leave her no matter wat.. and that i'll be waiting for her..
got a sms from her just now..

"Hey.. des.. u sent a sms to 933 yest? cos i heard it.."

"""Erm.. Ya.. Never thought you'd heard it.. Actually i sent everynight.. Hoping one night you'll hear it.. Don't hope for anything.. just hope you'll know i'm still around for you.. Always.."""

"Hai.. i see.. er.. don send le la.. i mean.. i don wanna waste your time or money.. frens r good too.. anewae.. thanx.. yest i heard it on my way bac frm work."

"""No la.. Perhaps its just a way to release my emotions.. Cos i nv felt this way before.. The pain.. The misses.. Everthing.. But i do mean every word i said.."""

"I know.. but i'm so good with my stead now.. i don wanna leave him.. i also wan u to know u r a nice guy.. can find v nice girls.."

"""Its not about whether i'm a nice guy or whether i can find a nice gal.. The thing is the love is there already it cant be transferred to another gal.. I cant choose who i love.. I can only accept it that you're who i love no matter i can be together with u anot.. Its not my choice but I jux gotta accept.."""

"""He can wait 4 months for you then i can wait 8 months, 16 months or even longer.. bcos i love you.. Nth more.. I'm not wastin time.. I know wat i'm doin.."""

there isnt anymore reply from her anymore.. I know shes very happy with her stead now.. well.. at least thats wat she says.. but no guarantee one day he might leave her.. hurt her.. I just wanna stay by her side and be there whenever she needs me.. It would be a lie if I say I dun nid any payback.. but for now.. the only thing I can do is to be there whenever she needs someone.. but even that is tough.. cos I dun tink our current state of relationship allows me to do so.. well.. no choice.. its all my fault to begin with.. so I cant grumble.. I've no one to blame except myself.. I'll try hard to change.. I'll be true to you.. all because I've really fallen deep into the abyss of loving you..
been into gaming (maplestory) alot for the past few days.. perhaps relieved me slightly from the pain.. but distracted me from studies too..
tmr got paper.. now gotta go study lerhs.. hmmms.. tmr maybe go Ngee Ann City the delifrance to interview.. $4/hr.. ok lar hor? kkkiex..
I'll cheer up and be a better man.. for her.. =)
cya peeps~

- Lost Soul #3385 -

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